I went with my Dad to watch the G.I. Joe movie last Friday. We hit the theatre for the first showing; I had a furlough day and he doesn’t work on Fridays so it was perfect. I forgot that the kids were out of school but the audience, made up of mostly teenagers, was surprisingly well behaved. Dad got a large soda, after all as the lady behind the counter explained it’s only 25 cents more than the medium…he got up twice to use the loo.
What stood out for me most is that the movie was loud…very, very loud. By far it was the loudest movie I have ever seen. Automatic weapons fire, laser pings, crashing cars, exploding bombs, falling buildings, screaming people, clashing swords, breaking glass, it was all there in ear splitting surround sound. Even my Dad, who is an action movie junkie, was bothered by the blare.
Still, it didn’t keep him from thoroughly enjoying himself. After all, it had guns, karate, and big breasted women in tight clothing. I think we were only 10 minutes in before he said something about the female leads needing to take their clothes off. Yeah, he’s “that” guy.
Anyway, I’m rambling today, there is no story, the plot is ridiculous, the acting is crap, the dialogue is worthless and there is not a shred of humanity throughout the entire piece. (There are so many unseen civilian casualties I have no doubt that the whole Joe Team would easily be convicted of war crimes.) However, the explosions the civilians die in are pretty damn cool.
In short, the movie is big, dumb, LOUD but fun. This is mostly due to the excellent pacing. It rumbles from one action scene to the next like Godzilla stomping through Tokyo . You don’t really care who lives or who dies, if the hero gets the girl or if Snake Eyes talks. Instead, you get this kind of blood lust where and the only thing that’s important is seeing what the director will blow up, smash or mangle next.
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Friday, August 7, 2009
For the love of lady X
Oddly, I was apparently dumped by the girlfriend I never had in the first place this evening. Yes, it’s as weird as it sounds.
So Woman X and I have been together for about the last 2 months. We’ve dated, went on a small vacation together, had a very healthy sex life and I believe seen each other exclusively. In my eyes she’s given the impression that she’s very much enjoyed what we have. She’s been in constant contact, says she worries about me if I don’t wear my bike helmet (a small sample of how she has illustrated that she cares about me) and has had unprotected sex with me numerous times. We’ve shared stories about our families, our pasts and talked about our futures. It has been much more intimate than other girls I’ve seen off and on or that I have enjoyed the friends with benefits situation with. To me, she’s given every impression of us being a couple, as a matter of fact, just the other day in front of a mutual friend I described X as a woman I was “seeing” and the friend insisted that X and I were a couple.
This evening X told me that she didn’t want us, as a couple, to be exclusive. She’s still on…fuck, I can’t remember what Internet dating service it is…but she says she has no plans to leave it but would still like to “date” me. Furthermore, she says that she’s not sure I’m the “one” and that she still needs the freedom to try to discover who the “one” might be.
I’d be cool with that if X was an inexperienced dater, but she’s no wallflower. If I was to judge by her own admissions, I’d say that she’s had a very active dating life. She’s shared stories about how she’s dated doctors, politicians and police officers and a bit about the sexual and emotional relationship she’s had with each. In my opinion, X has had a front row seat to many relationships that haven’t worked out for one reason or another.
Emotionally, I’m at a loss. I really don’t feel that I can make some grandiose Will-like statement on why this happened. Oh, plenty of theories run rampant in my head but…well, I’m just not ready yet to paint X as the bad guy. She may truly be confused or…well, whatever…
So Woman X and I have been together for about the last 2 months. We’ve dated, went on a small vacation together, had a very healthy sex life and I believe seen each other exclusively. In my eyes she’s given the impression that she’s very much enjoyed what we have. She’s been in constant contact, says she worries about me if I don’t wear my bike helmet (a small sample of how she has illustrated that she cares about me) and has had unprotected sex with me numerous times. We’ve shared stories about our families, our pasts and talked about our futures. It has been much more intimate than other girls I’ve seen off and on or that I have enjoyed the friends with benefits situation with. To me, she’s given every impression of us being a couple, as a matter of fact, just the other day in front of a mutual friend I described X as a woman I was “seeing” and the friend insisted that X and I were a couple.
This evening X told me that she didn’t want us, as a couple, to be exclusive. She’s still on…fuck, I can’t remember what Internet dating service it is…but she says she has no plans to leave it but would still like to “date” me. Furthermore, she says that she’s not sure I’m the “one” and that she still needs the freedom to try to discover who the “one” might be.
I’d be cool with that if X was an inexperienced dater, but she’s no wallflower. If I was to judge by her own admissions, I’d say that she’s had a very active dating life. She’s shared stories about how she’s dated doctors, politicians and police officers and a bit about the sexual and emotional relationship she’s had with each. In my opinion, X has had a front row seat to many relationships that haven’t worked out for one reason or another.
Emotionally, I’m at a loss. I really don’t feel that I can make some grandiose Will-like statement on why this happened. Oh, plenty of theories run rampant in my head but…well, I’m just not ready yet to paint X as the bad guy. She may truly be confused or…well, whatever…
Sunday, August 2, 2009
Potter again
I saw the new and extremely underwhelming Harry Potter movie Wednesday evening.
Don’t get your panties in a bunch yet! Before I start bitching, I want to praise what were some very strong aspects of the film.
The acting is great, and I’m not just talking about the secondary players like Jim Broadbent, Robbie Coltrane, Maggie Smith and Alan Rickman. They’ve always been awesome and could be considered one of the greatest ensembles ever assembled. Instead, it’s the “kids” that blew me away. They’ve matured well, sharpened their acting chops and have truly made the characters their own. For example, in the earlier movies all Rupert Grint had to do to play Ron Weasly was make funny faces and pretend to be scared of everything. Here he shows a full range of emotions, but more importantly he really nails his comedic timing. His scenes are far and away the best in the movie.
The Quiditch scenes are the best yet. It’s like you’re flying along on your own broom, dodging bludgers and trying to avoid cheating Slytherin players. It’s the little things you can see that really make it worthwhile. Players grab at one another, can be seen shifting their balance from one side of their brooms to other and best yet, CRASHING! Very cool and very exciting.
The special effects are fantastic. Not much to say here as it should be what the viewer expects. They’re realistic, tangible, cold when they should be and hot when it’s appropriate. Very well done.
Okay, on to the bad.
Story. Anyone who has read the novel knows that this book is kind of one big set-up for the finale. However, that being said, there are some very important and enlightening scenes that take place that really make the world and the characters realistic for the reader. While they may not come to much in the endgame, they’re why the books are so well loved.
Unfortunately, the movie leaves these scenes out for scenes that amount to even less in the grand scheme of things. They reveal little, add little and are boring, which brings me to my second point…
Pacing. The pacing in this film is awful. It drags with beautiful but pointless scenery, repetitive dialogue and…well basically, it’s filled with long scenes about things the watcher doesn’t really give a crap about. For the record, very uninteresting things that people don’t care about make for a bad cinematic experience.
Last and probably the most grievous mistake takes place in the Finale. Oh wait, what finale? Get it? You won’t get it in the theatre either.
Don’t get your panties in a bunch yet! Before I start bitching, I want to praise what were some very strong aspects of the film.
The acting is great, and I’m not just talking about the secondary players like Jim Broadbent, Robbie Coltrane, Maggie Smith and Alan Rickman. They’ve always been awesome and could be considered one of the greatest ensembles ever assembled. Instead, it’s the “kids” that blew me away. They’ve matured well, sharpened their acting chops and have truly made the characters their own. For example, in the earlier movies all Rupert Grint had to do to play Ron Weasly was make funny faces and pretend to be scared of everything. Here he shows a full range of emotions, but more importantly he really nails his comedic timing. His scenes are far and away the best in the movie.
The Quiditch scenes are the best yet. It’s like you’re flying along on your own broom, dodging bludgers and trying to avoid cheating Slytherin players. It’s the little things you can see that really make it worthwhile. Players grab at one another, can be seen shifting their balance from one side of their brooms to other and best yet, CRASHING! Very cool and very exciting.
The special effects are fantastic. Not much to say here as it should be what the viewer expects. They’re realistic, tangible, cold when they should be and hot when it’s appropriate. Very well done.
Okay, on to the bad.
Story. Anyone who has read the novel knows that this book is kind of one big set-up for the finale. However, that being said, there are some very important and enlightening scenes that take place that really make the world and the characters realistic for the reader. While they may not come to much in the endgame, they’re why the books are so well loved.
Unfortunately, the movie leaves these scenes out for scenes that amount to even less in the grand scheme of things. They reveal little, add little and are boring, which brings me to my second point…
Pacing. The pacing in this film is awful. It drags with beautiful but pointless scenery, repetitive dialogue and…well basically, it’s filled with long scenes about things the watcher doesn’t really give a crap about. For the record, very uninteresting things that people don’t care about make for a bad cinematic experience.
Last and probably the most grievous mistake takes place in the Finale. Oh wait, what finale? Get it? You won’t get it in the theatre either.
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Writing
I'm doing it! I'm doing it!
I've written the first 500 or so words for my newest story!! Now I just have to keep it up.
Anyway, I'm on my way to see the new Harry Potter movie with my Mom and Dad. Will give short review tomorrow.
I've written the first 500 or so words for my newest story!! Now I just have to keep it up.
Anyway, I'm on my way to see the new Harry Potter movie with my Mom and Dad. Will give short review tomorrow.
Monday, July 27, 2009
Just do it
It's a lame marketing ploy but from now on I'm just going to do it. I will update on a regular basis, at least once a week!
If I don't may the devil fill my ass with red hot coals and slather my in a nice honey glaze when I get down there.
If I don't may the devil fill my ass with red hot coals and slather my in a nice honey glaze when I get down there.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Universal Truths that only I seem to know
I’m not sure why, but there seems to be a handful of Universal Truths that only I know. In an attempt to remedy this here they are, in no particular order:
1. Julia Roberts is not attractive.
2. Reading a comic book is considered reading.
3. It’s important for people to have hobbies and to spend time alone enjoying them.
4. Crocs, the plastic shoe/sandal things, are hideous.
5. “How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days” is the worst movie ever made.
6. You can learn life skills playing Dungeons and Dragons.
7. Robin Williams is extremely creepy.
8. It’s fun to play board games.
9. Visible thong underwear is not attractive.
10. Listening to National Public Radio will keep you well informed.
11. Being oblivious to the world around you is dangerous and will cost you and possibly the rest of the world in the long run.
12. Sooner or later people become slaves to the things they own.
13. Men should not have smooth hairless bodies. Some grooming is good, too much and you’re a narcissistic asshole.
14. Automobiles are more dangerous than guns and we treat them like toys.
15. Introspection is the most important step in improving oneself.
16. The smell of one’s own farts is comforting.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Stimulate me baby
Social Service Stimulus
This part of the package is aimed at increasing the number of workers in the field of social services. Again, money will be funneled into scholarships and school programs that focus on social work, i.e. school councilors, drug and alcohol abuse councilors, child protective services workers, prisoner rehabilitation specialists and so on. Like the healthcare stimulus the ultimate goal is to get services to everyone who needs them. Feeling unusually down at school, there are always school councilors available. Experienced a period of rage aimed at your child last night, a councilor at your hospital takes walk-ins.
There are currently too many forgotten people in our country. They are the addicts, the homeless, the hungry, the hopeless, sometimes the lazy and the mentally ill and more often than not they end up costing the country a lot of money. Since they have no insurance they use emergency rooms for healthcare, they end up in jail, they live off of disability payments and welfare but most vexing it is these forgotten who become criminals. It’s the lady with untreated schizophrenia that stabs a stranger in downtown Sacramento , the hopeless and depressed teen who takes a gun to school and kills 4 classmates and so on. By reaching out and helping the lost instead of following our current course of inaction, it’s my hope that we can save money and save lives.
Up next…Education Stimulus
This part of the package is aimed at increasing the number of workers in the field of social services. Again, money will be funneled into scholarships and school programs that focus on social work, i.e. school councilors, drug and alcohol abuse councilors, child protective services workers, prisoner rehabilitation specialists and so on. Like the healthcare stimulus the ultimate goal is to get services to everyone who needs them. Feeling unusually down at school, there are always school councilors available. Experienced a period of rage aimed at your child last night, a councilor at your hospital takes walk-ins.
There are currently too many forgotten people in our country. They are the addicts, the homeless, the hungry, the hopeless, sometimes the lazy and the mentally ill and more often than not they end up costing the country a lot of money. Since they have no insurance they use emergency rooms for healthcare, they end up in jail, they live off of disability payments and welfare but most vexing it is these forgotten who become criminals. It’s the lady with untreated schizophrenia that stabs a stranger in downtown Sacramento , the hopeless and depressed teen who takes a gun to school and kills 4 classmates and so on. By reaching out and helping the lost instead of following our current course of inaction, it’s my hope that we can save money and save lives.
Up next…Education Stimulus
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